Okay. Here I am, it’s midnight and I’ve been stuck on what topic I want to write on. But I have decided to write on something that I am currently facing. The walk down the mountain.
For me, the walk down the mountain is so hard. But before I get into it, I’ll explain it for those who don’t know what I’m talking about.
At different times in our lives, in our faith, we may experience mountain top experiences. Moments of when we are so on fire for our faith, moments of when it seems we are so close to God, moments of when are faith is so real or tangible. Maybe it is an epiphany in your faith, or a moment of “I finally get it, it’s real.” You may experience these mountain top experiences at a retreat, a conference, or maybe suddenly and randomly at church during a homily or sermon.
The thing is though, you can’t stay on the mountaintop forever.
You have to eventually come down the mountain.
I’ve been blessed to have a few mountain top experiences. So I know how it goes when I need to take the walk down. Generally after a mountain top experience I tend to go into a time of dryness or desolation. This happens in my prayer, my faith, or in my relationship with God, and sometimes all three. And it’s happened enough that if I ever think, “this could be a mountain top experience” or “this is a peak in my faith”, I suddenly get frightened or scared, because “I know” that a time of dryness is coming. That’s what I think, and then I scare myself into thinking I’m in this period, when in reality I’m not.
However, when I actually do experience dryness or desolation, it makes me feel so separate or distant from God. I wonder – “where is God during this time? Does He hear me? Does He care? WHY?” You might have been in this place., and maybe you’ve asked those questions.
Truthfully, I can’t give the answer. Only God can.
But I can say and give MY thoughts on why.
“In times of desolation, God conceals Himself from us so that we can discover for ourselves what we are without Him.”
-Saint Margaret of Cortona
I love that quote because I believe that it’s so true. We are nothing without God, and in my personal times of desolation or dryness, I can assure you that I feel like nothing. I feel so empty, I feel so weak, I feel so helpless.
But in those times of desolation, I am not alone. God is with me.
Just because I don’t feel God, It doesn’t mean He isn’t there. He is there, He is listening, He is anticipating the time of when you both come together again.
Please know this and take these tips that have helped me and others I know. When in times of dryness or desolation; continue to pursue the Lord with an undying persistence. Don’t change any of your routines of when you weren’t in this period. Continue to pray, PRAY HARDER, and PRAY MORE. Don’t lose your faith, but instead let it grow. Ask people to pray for you and ask for help for accountability.
It’s normal. Everyone who has ever had a mountain top experience has had to take the walk down. Don’t feel like it’s a weird, new, or bizarre situation. Also, remember that the walk down the mountain can be different for different people. And don’t scare yourself into it either like I did. God will let it happen when it needs to.
Don’t give up hope. Pursue Him, because He is never done pursuing you.
Prayer: God, in this time, help me to continue to pursue you. Help me to chase you. I know that you will never leave me God, so help me to stay close to you. Help me to grow in this time, and even though it might get hard, help me to follow your guiding light. Even if I don’t see it.
Scripture verse: Psalm 121: 1-2
Song stuck in my head: Extravagant – Bethel